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| Film still from "The Door In The Floor" |
after everything left
dangling unsaid
had been said
but before
the absolute end of it all
in that small punctuation
of light before dusk
that glistening
surrendering eye of silent truce
this is where
i have chosen to remember you
that glistening
surrendering eye of silent truce
this is where
i have chosen to remember you
Rene ~ January 2011
I saw that movie ... or at least a bit of it.
ReplyDeleteAhhh!
ReplyDelete"punctuation of light"
I can't tell if the door is opening or closing...and I like that.
i wonder if we all have those mental snap shots we cling to...to remember...
ReplyDeletethose moments frozen in our minds eye, do they ever fade?
ReplyDeleteNicely done to the prompt. I did not see the movie, but I must try and find it.
ReplyDeletePamela
You have chosen - and interpreted - a beautiful image.
ReplyDeleteVery atmospheric.
'a small punctuation of light before dusk' what a showing phrase! I can feel this piece - lovely work.
ReplyDeleteBeautifully composed - just right!
ReplyDeleteThere's many a door in a floor I wish I'd fallen through...
ReplyDeleteGood fit to the photo.
ReplyDeletehttp://liv2write2day.wordpress.com/2011/01/28/perfect-family-big-tent-poetry/
This one really touched me. I tried to pick a favorite line, but they all stand out strong.
ReplyDelete~laurie
there comes a time
ReplyDeletewhen there are
no words.
(you rock)
Ah, that moment, that hesitation, that wonder of future regret, that loss of familiarity. Loss, even then. That's what it is.
ReplyDeleteCasey
Nice one Rene.
ReplyDeleteNever been able to do this. My exes pretty much have the run of my mind. I guess I like it this way.
ReplyDeleteThis is a wonderful poem--I particularly like your 2nd stanza! Some wonderful imagery here.
ReplyDeleteOh I like it. It's like choosing to hold on to the moment just before they let go!
ReplyDelete"...that glistening surrendering eye of silent truce...."
ReplyDeleteThis is where the sounds and rhythms of words combine with their meanings to create something truly gorgeous.
Very eloquent.
ReplyDeleteThank you everyone for stopping in, reading my stuff and telling me what you think about it. I truly appreciate that you have taken the time.
ReplyDeleteI recommend "The Door In The Floor" as a Netflix pick.It's based on John Irving's "A Widow For One Year".
The scene near the end where Marion ( Kim Basinger) and Ted ( Jeff Bridges)silently say goodbye is nothing short of superb.
Vintage Rene....
ReplyDeleteWonderfully said..
ReplyDeletesingular thoughts
Thresholds. Such a great word/idea/diving board.
ReplyDeleteRene, this was my absolute favorite of your poems so far. Absolutely loved the word choice, rhythm, and poignancy. Well done. Well done.
ReplyDeleteFantastic words adn great ending. :)
ReplyDeleteI've seen more people pass on than most and I'm convinced that, upon our deathbeds, our minds will be so worn bare that all we will have is our own biased memories of what was. That's probably how we will judge the value of our lives.
ReplyDeleteYou've summed that same phenomenon up nicely, albeit for the death of a relationship. That is something that I am personally more familiar with and less fond of than death.
Beautifuly and elegant!
ReplyDeletelovely imagery,
ReplyDeleteyour words rock.
Happy Potluck!
A++
Very well done Renee. I especially like the closing lines. This one is worth reading over again.
ReplyDeleteVery nice.
ReplyDelete