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Showing posts from October, 2008

Returning Fear's Gift

So here I am standing at the edge of all things safe and familiar. My heart is a John Bonham drum solo in my ears. My toes are white knuckled and taking a bite out of the diving board. I so desperately want to turn around and nestle into the warm bosom of all things safe and sound...but not as desperately as I want this. I want to be closer to being fearless. Fear and I go way back. We have had quite a courtship over the years. He lavishes me with all the unearned praise that I could ever want, while feeding me sugary sweet spoonfuls of good intentions. As a result I have become lazy,weak and, worst of all, hypercritical of those who have the audacity to risk failure. Ahh..but he loves me anyway. Whenever I feel the urge to be daring he lures me into bed and into his warm, vanilla scented embrace. I am such a lucky girl. He has kept me so very safe and unbroken all these years. So, so very thankful to be unbroken, unfulfilled, unknown, untested. Unfortunate. The tim