The Fifty Cent Tour

Sunday, October 7, 2012

the letting go

the will
is gone

and all
that's left

is the thrill
of passing on

of leaving
debts

and dirty
laundry

lists and
tangled ends

family and
fortunes

unsorted
undone

and so
with the letting go

begins
the end


~

a brave
new face

with a mission
carved in stone

sits down
beside me

finds a way
into my bed

whistling
eyes smiling

hand on
my thigh

marking time
by my gate

picking the lock
on my soul

always
faithful

forever
charming

darling
it's time

he croons
softly

when are you
coming home?


Rene ~ October 2012

Image: Sick Woman, 1655, Jan Steen via Magpie Tales

Pretty depressing take on the prompt.
When I saw the smile on the woman's face the first thing I thought was that she was dying and had come to terms with it. She was ready to let go.

28 comments:

  1. the thought of deaths eyes smiling waiting by the gate is pretty haunting...and the end will find us all eventually...

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    1. I imagined Christopher Walken

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    2. did you change this from when i first read it? the ending seems to have softened quite a bit...

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    3. Yeah, I changed it up. I do that from time to time.

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  2. When it comes to death, a lot of people (myself included) worry about all the things that will be left unfinished. But as people often say, "their worries are over" too. Depressing, yes, but I like your take on it.

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  3. Your Mag is timely for me -- and well done ~~ My 16-year old grandson asked a profound question of me today ~~~ 'how do you deal with the idea of death at your age' ... it threw me. He was getting ready to hike our ski mountain ... I told him it was a serious question and deserved a thoughtful answer ... . (I've been pondering my response all afternoon, think I'm ready with an answer.)

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  4. I think I would like that kind of death. When I'm saged and spent, and ready to meet the skully smile of Old Man Death. I would probably whistle, too ;-)

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  5. Depressing? Maybe. But not so much when I consider your postscript. Maybe she just knew, and to be ready must be a truly amazing thing.

    Peace, Rene.

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  6. Not all that depressing--and I liked the write a bunch!

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  7. The thrill of passing on. Yes, I guess there is a sort of thrill to it. Along with a way to find peace.

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  8. Must admit, I was glad to get to the end of your long list of woes...

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  9. I love this inyerrwining yarn of sex and death, Rene , thanks

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  10. i liked this so much,,,,beautifulxx

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  11. On to the next great adventure...
    (I totally get the Christopher Walken image too)

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  12. I believe I know why the girl smiles. The doctor told her,

    I adore your friendly style,
    worship your approving smile,
    which by no means you are fit!
    Definitely you’ve got it!

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  13. I found this work, not depressing, but thrilling. The second poem is so alive, this was great.

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  14. I loved this. Those last lines are rich. I read this four or five times just to let them sink it.

    excellet

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  15. Good write...when time comes the important thing to me would be to go with dignity. Nicely penned.

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  16. There definitely is a contrast between the mood in the first poem and the second. I agree with Ayala. Dying with dignity is the key.

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    1. Absolutely. Remember the movie "The Ghost and Mrs. Muir" ...how beautiful to slip away into the next life like that.

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  17. I love the attenuated line length and rhythmic cadence. You told your tale well.

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  18. so good when we can let go when our end comes...though i think it is not easy

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  19. Sometimes loved ones linger and hold on waiting to say goodbye......letting go is always hard.....a powerful write Rene!

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  20. Morbid,how depressing! You really brought out that feel with your verse. Very effective Rene!

    Hank

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  21. What lovely lively words on the theme of death. Ivigorating stuff although for now I will hang onto the unfinished stuff...

    Anna :o]

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