The Fifty Cent Tour

Saturday, March 31, 2012

mara

Image: ParkeHarrison
Magpie Tales


when the dark presses
faith
scatters like paper
lit on fire

courage rises
and pratfalls
darkly
down waxed hospital corridors

prayers
soaked in sour wine
blister the tongue
unanswered

the body a vessel
the soul
a marionette
hijacked, voiceless

help me
if you can
reach me
here i am

Rene~March 2012
for d'Verse Poets



"The Nightmare"
by Henry Fuseli

30 comments:

  1. I am tongue tied, at a loss for words to describe how stunning this is.

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  2. help me if you can reach me....oy...i like the soul marionette as well...manipulated in the strings...nicely done rene

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  3. Very good. 'scatters like paper on fire'

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  4. Dark and searching. Very nice write!
    http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2012/03/31/blood-on-the-moon-3/

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  5. Fantastic imagery - not a single word out of place - I love this

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  6. I've felt this in what is known as sleep paralysis. The prayers are not answered and the presence of evil is terrible. Your poem captures that terror that stifles all cries for help.

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  7. Beautiful write, Rene. I especially like "...prayers soaked in sour wine
    blister the tongue unanswered..."

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  8. the soul a marionette, that's interesting concept. hijacked marionette is even better.


    in the dragon's nest

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  9. I like it.. Sme good new lines for me too..

    JJRod'z

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  10. I don't think I'll sleep tonight...very powerful!

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  11. You waxed poetic and despaired quite elegantly - agreeing with all, lovely free verse.

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  12. So powerful and so powerless all at the same time, Rene. I have been in the places where your poem dwells. Thank you for sharing this expressive work. The picture at the end adds poignancy.

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  13. Superb, wonderful, wonderful words!

    Anna :o]

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  14. Excellent! I really love the desperation and the rhythm.

    This is my favorite:
    "when the dark presses
    faith
    scatters like paper
    lit on fire"

    rosemarymint.wordpress.com

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  15. This piece is one of the most skilfully written pieces ever and for me right now it hits a nerve!

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  16. So few words, but so rich in imagery and meaning. I applaud you.

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  17. powerful indeed....well done and thanks for sharing these words

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  18. So much to love about this, esp:
    "when the dark presses
    faith
    scatters like paper
    lit on fire"

    and

    "help me
    if you can
    reach me
    here i am"

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  19. a big cry for help. but we help ourselves when we awaken.

    semantic feeling

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  20. If I were to select my favorite line or image, this entire piece would be selected. Exquisite, powerful, breathtaking.

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  21. Wonderful poem.

    A painful picture you painted with your words but beautiful said with strong emotions.

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  22. Loved the image of burnt paper flakes ascending - like a sacrificial prayer, perhaps?

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  23. Love it. Especially the ending.

    =)

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  24. "the body a vessel
    the soul
    a marionette
    hijacked, voiceless"

    Cornered, used, no choice--nightmare!

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  25. "the soul, a marionette, hijacked"......wow, kiddo, powerful writing!

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  26. Rene, those last four lines are particularly striking. Thanks for being a part of FBF, but just one note for future reference, dearie...the prompt asks for a new poem, not a repost. K? Oh, I know, the devil made you do it...

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  27. wow...darkness and that painting. Oh my.

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