The Fifty Cent Tour

Sunday, November 27, 2011

dubious luxury

Image: Christine Donnier-Valentin
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you should stand out
from the crowd but
you gotta hold back
ju-u-st enough
pick your place and
your moment
wisely
otherwise folks'll be
skeptical
and that diamond tiara
may as well be
a tin-foil hat
it's like i'm always sayin'
to my girl Frankie,
honey, don't matter
if you're wearing
the right red dress if
it's the wrong damn time
people can smell
trying-too-hard
from a mile away

Rene ~ November 2011

27 comments:

  1. Ain't that the truth?

    Love it.

    Pearl

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  2. Tryin' too hard, indeed...love it!

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  3. great close on this rene...and yeah they can...

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  4. very nice.... and simple..... makes for a good read!

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  5. This is perfectly brilliant Rene!!
    Love it!!!!

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  6. I like how you bounce your poem off the wall of the prompt -- by era, by couch-conversation-ness, by the colour of the couch and maybe the mustiness of the smell of trying too hard.

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  7. Great interpretation of Tess's picture, well expressed.

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  8. that was terrific
    really terrific

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  9. Greetings from the world of trying-too-hard. :-)

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  10. 'ju-u-st enough' ... I can hear it!

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  11. Love it!! Gotta know when it is the "right time"

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  12. Oh, isn't that the truth? Girl, what have you been sprinkling on your corn flakes lately? Your poems have been kicking ass and taking names.

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  13. So true, so true! Nice job, I like your take on this.
    Happy holidays, jj

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  14. So true. So true. I am trying to teach this concept to my girls. I hope it sticks. Well done. :)

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  15. I enjoyed reading your poem here, thank you.

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  16. "It's the wrong damn time." I love this line. It was perfectly placed and impact filled.

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  17. You have created such a scene in my head! Tell your girl Frankie, I love it!

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  18. This is a great voice, so distinct and I love the dry humor and raw wisdom of it all.

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  19. Really nice poem, love how it works with the image.

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  20. Smack on the prompt- that was fabulous!

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