Rene ~ 2010 |
was at da bottom o'da well
alive and kickin' as da day she wuz born
ah hadda believe her
ah just hadda...
nowadays she always yammerin' on 'bout
such crazy nonsense, po' thing
Hope'd gone missin' weeks ago.
an' so ah went down, like i always do
down to dat well wit Faith lookin'
thot Hope'd be bobbin' along up top
on accounta her dead floatin' and all...
an' ah'd just scoop her on out
...but no Hope, not now, again
it was nuthin' der
it wuz never nuthin' der
but water an' more water
i wuz tired of all this crazy
so i just grab Faith's fat ol' hand an' say
"See, she ain't here, i ain't seen her, so you ain't seen her, so hesh up fool!"
dass when Faith got all spooky eye'd an' tol't me
"Emmie, u ain't never believed me, not now, not yeser'day
until u do, ain't gun'be any Hope...
not now, not never"
Rene ~ 2010
One Stop Poetry is now calling for submissions. If you wish to post an article, highlight an artist, or use our platform to promote a worthy cause; we'd like to here from you.
Rene, you are so very gifted with words!
ReplyDeleteThis is like a cross between, "Beloved" and "The Ring"!
ReplyDeleteI love it!
Kat
Good grief. What got into you, girl? It's good and strong. Bravo!
ReplyDeletenice...i like this...and the personification of faith and hope...
ReplyDeleteIf the well is restful, you see yourself in the bottom. I saw you. I believed.
ReplyDeleteWords come alive -- in more ways than one -- when you get your hands on them.
ReplyDelete:-)
Pearl
You always give such emotions to your words. Your poetry & stories just jump off the page. Well done Rene!
ReplyDeleteWhere did you come up with this, Rene? I love it. I like the vernacular, and the whole way the poem unfolds is just the way it should, til the ending which is right on the money. Ain't heard tell of no poem like dis here befo. ;-)
ReplyDeleteLov da dep of yer well der... nicely done, to pull so well on the intangible, allowing it to speak through your words, and still offer Hope in the end.
ReplyDeleteWhat a conversation! I like it- however I would caution that it is only one version of the story- sometimes my hope and faith walk together and sometimes
ReplyDeleteone or the other takes the lead! they certainly influence one another...right now today, I have to say hope has popped back up and faith is watching her go forth- Thanks!
Ah wuz thinkin meybee it were Hope dat took dat walk down t' da way-ell. Ah gives her credit fo' da walk.
ReplyDeleteWow! This poem really comes to life. Some great comparisons in the comments too. Reminded me a bit of Mark Twain. Great writing, Rene :)
ReplyDeleteOoohh...this, I like! I really really like!
ReplyDeleteLoved how you personified them both.. oodles of meaning this one, Rene! A super cool poem!! And the style was simply yo!!
Ooohh...this, I like! I really really like!
ReplyDeleteLoved how you personified them both.. oodles of meaning in this one, Rene! A super cool poem!! And the style was simply yo!!
P.S: the previous was mine... it got posted as an anonymous comment :(
always surprising me with your creativity, Rene. you are amazing. Great conclusion here.
ReplyDeleteI'm struggling with this all the time. In fact, I'm about a month into a year-long project on the matter. Maybe I'll let someone read it someday. Prolly not though.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Casey
I likeed reading you Renee..first time here..but i will be back certainly!
ReplyDeletelove how you portray hope and faith..:)
cheers..:)
First tine I have read your work and I liked it
ReplyDeleteThis touched me..
ReplyDeleteretrieval
thanks for sharing I liked reading your feelings...
ReplyDeleteॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com