this is the story
of a girl
who lived
in the basement
of the girl next door
shelteredin the confines
of a suburban
tract house dungeon;
her punishment for runnin' wild
with dreams
half unlatched
she ran
like a spirit in the night
from those badlands
wind blowin'
through her hair
shielding her eyes
from the blinding light
she hugged onto a shoreline of hope
someday soon,
she's not sure when
her savior will rise up
from the streets
with
an armload
of rain soaked
roses
and second chances
Rene ~ 2010
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yeah i think she will make it out of the basement...smiles. i got faith...
ReplyDeleteYeh I'm with Brian ... there is always hope & the possibility of change! Nice Magpie
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment on my page :)
ReplyDeleteThis is amazing though: "thunder road lovers holding tight" I love it. I've bookmarked you for future reading. :)
oh, hells to the yeah! You'se the boss with the hot sauce, you know that? Mmm, mmm...run with the wolves, my dear...
ReplyDeleteAnd?
ReplyDelete"...rain soaked roses and second chances..."
Is masterful.
Word.
yeah, i got the soundtrack to this one in my head. oh oh oh oh oh. love it.
ReplyDeleteI love this poem. What a great angle you take here, Rene -- so clever.
ReplyDeletehope is her salvation...and ours ---she will make it...bkm
ReplyDeleteWhat's her phone number?
ReplyDeleteJeffScape has a Harley and a spare leather jacket with a bottle of JB in the pocket... every girl's dream! Ha ha! Don't tell him, Rene!
ReplyDeleteI too am confident she will make it out of the basement. Where there's a will, there's a way!
ReplyDeletecarrying an armload of rain soaked roses and second chances
ReplyDeleteSounds like a good idea to me!
Well written poem. Hoping for a second, third, and even fourth chance until something takes!
ReplyDelete"She believes this faith will save her..."
ReplyDeleteI hope she never loses it.
Such a beautiful piece, so few words creating such an expanse of experience.
Pearl
Basement blues - I saw the same image. Nice one.
ReplyDelete"An armload of rain-soaked roses and second chances." Good stuff!
ReplyDeletehow romantic! and a tad wistful?
ReplyDeleteI liked it.
The inner life is the only reality anyway. Might as well live it.
ReplyDeleteThanks everyone!
ReplyDeleteWith each of Willow's Magpies I go with my first thoughts on the photo.
As soon as I saw this weeks photo I swear I heard the opening harmonica riff of Thunder Road...and so I ran with it.
and Jeff?
her number is 867-5309
Thanks again everyone :)
Love that "shoreline of hope"!
ReplyDeleteI lost my comment, I like the first part very, very much! But I'm afraid she will have to find her own way out.....
ReplyDeleteLove "she believes this faith will save her" I feel that sometimes too. Very nice Rene
ReplyDeleteI hope that she makes it out of the basement and flies like a bird.
ReplyDeleteMercy. What DON'T i love about this?
ReplyDeletegirl who lives in the basement of the girl next door
dreams half unlatched
a savior...carrying an armload of rain soaked roses
Stop it, Rene, this just taps into every nervous, restless, hopeful gorgeous dream a girl ever had. I fucking LOVE this.
wow- nice post!
ReplyDeletePS--laffin at your answer to Jeff
ReplyDelete"shoreline of hope"
ReplyDelete"Rain soaked roses and second chances"
Beautiful lines.
Yup that's me! I was that girl. Great magpie.
ReplyDeleteOh, I hope so!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI love it. It's almost music. I love it.
ReplyDelete"Someday soon, she's not sure when..." Wistful, hopeful, needy, strong. All at the same time. I love it. What you have done with words!
The first three lines are brilliant followed by even more brilliant lines! I loved it :o)
ReplyDeleteIt was just like a story..loved it..nice magpie!
ReplyDeletethe hope, as a girl, that someone will swoop in and save you. the faith that you are worth in. the knowledge from experience, that you can save yourself.
ReplyDeletethanks rene,
e
I can imagine her ... hope is a marvelous thing.
ReplyDeleteLovely. :-) Optimism is a wonderful trait.
ReplyDeletehey i love that Rene...and the pic is brilliant to go with it....missed you :)) xoxo
ReplyDeleteShe needs 2 get up off her butt & save herself. Not gd 2 depend on smone else if u can do 4 urself.
ReplyDeleterunning from the badlands. . . rain soaked roses and second chances. . .brilliant. love this.
ReplyDeleteif you have hope, hope knocks at your door...
ReplyDeletesuperb tale.
masterful job.
wonderful story--- hope shines brightly-well done!
ReplyDeleteThis is an amazing poem. I am full of admiration.
ReplyDeleteWow. How sad. How hopeful.
ReplyDeleteBravo. I am a little heartbroken here on this one. I know her so well. Damned mirrors.
(And thanks for the comment on mine.)
This is beautiful. I love "hugs onto a shoreline of hope"! Hope DOES spring eternal, doesn't it?
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks for visiting my blog. Visitors and helpful, hopeful comments always appreciated.
Kay, Alberta
"hugs onto a shoreline of hope",
ReplyDeleteWonderful ! She'll make it, yes she will.
Oooh, love the line...'hugs onto a shoreline of hope'... yes, I think she will make it out of this basement... or at least, let's hope.
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by my place. Truly appreciate the comments and input from my fellow writers.
definitely some great imagery
ReplyDeletewind blowin' through her hair
she shields her eyes from the blinding light
and hugs onto a shoreline of hope
as we all aspire to
You know..I saw myself somewhere in her...I could very well relate to that emotion...
ReplyDeleteBeautiful magpie...
Very well done Rene. Really, quite excellent!
ReplyDeleteThis is my favourite entry so far.
ReplyDeleteI, too, love the line 'carrying an armload of rain soaked roses and second chances'.
What wonderful visionary.
Oh! Oh my god! Oh my! I loved this. I loved the hope. I loved the images "carrying an armload of rain soaked roses and second chances" wow. Like post-sex-lying-comfortably-type of wow.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful magpie -- I love all the lines and way you twisted them to suit your purpose.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to know what to say after all these comments. I agree with them all. This is a lovely poem that flows beautifully across the tongue, past the ears and into the mind and heart.
ReplyDeletePG
I could see myself somewhere in this too -- I really loved it, both the way it was written and the subject. And I loved the title! Well done.
ReplyDeleteJust reading this again. Love that "edgy darkness" line. So grainy adn strong.
ReplyDeleteBTW, dear Rene, you were so sweet to leave that verse. I had never heard it before and it was a good one to think on. thank you.
I totally appreciate the Thunder Road reference. This definitely reads like a song lyric. It would work so well set to music. Very cool!
ReplyDelete