The Fifty Cent Tour

Thursday, March 4, 2010

yellow house

that's the last time
she said
as she put it on the shelf
behind
the last, last time

but maybe next time
just not now
everything's fine
no, really
everything's good

how convincingly
she fooled them all
her throat stinging
how lovely her cunning
her eyes shining
if nothing else
there was that
and dreams greater than
her less than
fine

Peace ~ Rene

15 comments:

  1. whew. i hope she finds the strength...

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  2. Ahh, we can never truly fool ourselves, can we?

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  3. Courage, lass...we can find it :)

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  4. You weave this together beautifully...your form so perfectly reflects her indecision...and the feeling of being trapped...extraordinary! ~Janine XO

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  5. "...and her freedom
    just outside
    that door
    if she could only
    walk across
    that floor
    and lead a life
    greater than
    this less than
    fine"

    You nailed it right there, Rene. She is finally free.

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  6. You continue to awe me with your great writing.

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  7. Very pretty. And from a writing perspective, I LOVE the way you came back to the shelf. You left it alone just long enough for the reader to begin to forget and then made me look at it again. So good.

    Cheers,

    SLC

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  8. Fantastic! Wonderfully written! I would be truly honored if you gave your poetic advice on my blogs of poetry and follow them if you like.

    http://thehumanicana.blogspot.com/

    http://humanicanagold.blogspot.com/

    If you found my poetry interesting I would love it if you followed my blog of Idealism and justice.

    http://terrandaily.blogspot.com/

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  9. Fantastic. That just slid off my brain so easily, Rene.

    That deserves music. It really does.

    Pearl

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  10. non-stick poetry for busy brains
    that's my new tag-line :)

    Thanks Pearly girl
    Rene

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  11. I read this aloud, Rene. It was wonderful. It was like rhythmic panting to get out, get out, get out....
    Good work!

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  12. I always want to yell b*llsh*t when someone tells me everything's fine...

    Love your Spring countdown... and just noticing your side bar change up. Love your sentiments there.

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  13. UnSilencing Violence is possibly the best choice anyone can ever make.

    Beautifully, poignantly written.

    Namaste.

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  14. VERY important poem here in fact. I love this. Thank you for saying it so well.

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